Robbing God of His Blessings

I have contemplated whether or not it was permissible for me to share, but I believe the Lord wants to reassure other families as He did for us.

To the family- the mom, the dad, the grandma, the grandpa, the aunt, or the uncle, may you receive the message the Lord has for you too…

Faltered Stewardship

This past year (and more) has been hard. For our family and, I know, many others. We have faced challenges of varying degrees, testing our faithfulness, our patience, our endurance, our perseverance, or our stewardship of the time, resources, and finances given to us.

Expenses have risen exponentially. Some may have gone further in debt just to scathe by. Some may have picked up another job, or side work, to earn a little extra. Some may have done without to ensure their kids or grandkids get what they need. Some may have had to depend or ask another for help.

In all transparency, we have done a little bit of everything above. But even though the Lord has been gracious to provide our every need, when we need it, we haven’t always been the wisest with every dollar we have been blessed with. When we should have saved, we spent. When we paid off debt, we should have kept it for the unexpected.

As we near Christmas, the pressure of covering the floor under our tree with beautifully wrapped presents weighs heavy. Especially this year.

Relinquishing the Need to Have

We have been trying to take care of debt accrued since closing the bakery storefront. I not only gave up a passion, but our family sacrificed a second income. EVERYTHING has exponentially increased too, making this lifestyle of homeschooling, by conviction of the Holy Spirit, very challenging.

Jaron and I made the difficult decision, albeit a wise one, that Christmas was not going to be full of presents this year. Instead, we are going to focus on experiences together and with family.

Nine years ago I started what we call “Family Christmas Activities” (real original, I know), where each day of December has a special family-focused activity we do. This personally helped me focus less on all the presents on Christmas Day, and rather, focus on togetherness the entire month. Each year we add new, age-appropriate activities as the boys get older. It’s certainly become a favored tradition in our home.

This year, Jaron and I thought we’d make an even bigger deal of our annual tradition while still not spending a lot of money, and truly focusing on experiences together and with family.

We don’t believe God would honor our stewardship of finances if we went further in debt just to buy Christmas presents. But we know He will honor our decision to steward what we have to make the most of the season.

While it was a difficult discussion to have, we were both in agreement this was the right decision. We have to regain control of our finances, and steward what we have better.

Fixing My Eyes on the Lord Changes My Perspective

As I laid down for bed that night, combating guilt and shame, but also hope and contentment in our decision, I prayed. As I prayed, I began to weep as I was unsure how to communicate this to the boys. What about my boys whose primary love language is gift-giving and gift-receiving? How do we ensure they feel loved this Christmas!?

My prayers turned from asking God to prepare the boys’ hearts for the truth of what their daddy and I decided to asking how we were going to make sure our boys felt loved, seen and heard.

In that moment, the Spirit said to me, “my dear, this whole year has been a gift for your family. You have been given more time together, more freedom, more time to travel, more time to visit family…it’s just been spread out and not as tangible as presents under the tree…”

I then had the impression that Jaron and I were not be ashamed or hide this truth from the boys but instead use it as a lesson. There may come a day in their future where hardships come and they too have to make a discerning decision of whether or not to go into debt for Christmas gifts.

My hope would be that they would look back on this unique year with fondness at the memories we made, and have the confidence that they too can make their family’s Christmas special, even without presents.

God Provides a Way

The next day, I happened to open my email (which is very unusual for me, considering I have 7,953 unread email notifications) and saw a message about Ellsworth County Christmas Store.

Thinking this was an opportunity for the kids and I to volunteer, I opened the email. But instead of feeling inclined to volunteer, I felt the Lord invite me to complete the request form.

I don’t need that though, I thought.

There are others who could benefit from this more, I thought.

But what if people look down on us, I thought. What if people look at us with pity or judgement?

Initially, I resisted His invitation to utilize a resource right here in my community. I let the pride and shame from the night before creep back to the surface of my heart.

My cries the night before were to God to help me figure out how to make sure my gift-receiving boys would still feel loved this Christmas…

When I stopped making it about me, and repented of my prideful attitude, I completed the form.

Nearly Robbing God of His Blessings

Why do I share of all this? Because I want those who the Lord wants to speak to hear this too-

God is good. He sees you. He knows it’s been a hard year. He knows how you have and have not spent your money. He knows you want to get something nice for your family.

Don’t squander the Spirit by robbing God

of His blessing to you through others

because of pride, shame, or guilt.

Instead of going into debt for gifts…

Instead of being prideful and keeping the burden of hardships on yourself…

Instead of going without…

Utilize the resources in your community to bless your family as the Lord opens doors.

As my grandparents have always said to each other, “Don’t rob me of my [God-inspired] blessing to someone.”

God has blessed some families with the resources and faithfulness to do thinks like the Ellsworth County Christmas Store. Don’t squander the Spirit by robbing God of His blessing to you through others because of pride, shame, or guilt. Those are the enemies attempts to steer your heart away from receiving His provision.

You and I may not always need help at Christmas. This may be a unique year where a “hand up” would be truly be helpful. Maybe the Lord will someday use you or I to be a blessing to others. But regardless, as He spoke to me, it’s okay.

He still loves you. He loves all His children; so much, in fact, that just like we want to give good gifts to our children, He desires to do so even more:

"If you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask Him!" Matthew 7:11, NKJV

Shame Has No Place

I hope you are encouraged to utilize resources as you need this season. I hope to normalize the reality of what many families are struggling with.

I was ashamed, but really quickly learned how shame can rob me of a blessing from the Lord.

I realize what needs to change in our lives to ensure this doesn’t happen again, but thanks be to God for the ECCS and their donors to help a family like ours this Christmas season.

After I had submitted the request for help, I quickly got a response back telling me my budget. I was to send links of the boys’ wish lists, though they each were only truly begging for one thing each. So I sent the link to the ONE thing each boy wanted to ECCS and one gift for all three of them to enjoy together, and (I can’t make this up) the total, with tax, was $.47 less than my budget.

God had surely heard my cries for help! If that isn’t an answer to prayer…

God is so good, even in our mess of choices and hardships, He still wants to show Himself to us.

So please, accept the blessing of God through other individuals, organizations, or families in your community as He leads them.

It’s hard to ask for help. It’s hard to accept help. And it’s hard not to feel ashamed of what may have led to the position of needing help, but God knows that. He knows our requests before we even speak them.

This is just a season. We must believe there is a turnaround coming. Remain faithful and strive to be a good steward of the things He has blessed you with.

Merry Christmas, in Christ, my friend.